better to have loved;; than never loved at all?!

[CARLY GRANT]

I'M BRUISED AND SCARRED
save me from this broken heart
ALL MY LOVE WILL SLOWLY FADE
& F A L L A P A R T
• • • • •

When Carly opened her incredibly heavy eyelids, it was 2:00 PM, and she had no idea where she was.

In fact, she had almost no recollection of the night before...except Lane. And driving. And lots, and lots and lots of drinking.

Her entire body felt as if it had been crushed by a giant boulder, every single limb aching agonizingly. And her head...oh her head…it was numb with pain, pulsing and throbbing with utter pain, until she could barely even breathe, and her blond curls knotted into a mass so disgusting, a spider could have made it its home. As she shakily peered into the mirror hanging beside the bed, she stared at the weakest, sickest girl she’d ever seen, with eyes so bloodshot, they were almost frightening.

What had happened last night? Why was the room spinning? Spinning....spinning...oh God, why wouldn't it stop? And why did this bed not feel as welcoming as it usually did?

Then she realized. It wasn't her bed.

Far too exhausted to scream, Carly whimpered feebly, glancing underneath the covers. She was wearing underwear. That was a good sign. Sex was great...but not when you can't remember it in the morning. But what if she had done it, and he'd just wanted to cover the evidence? She felt sick to her stomach. Although her underwear was still gratefully on her body, unfortunately, it was the only thing that was....which meant that something, if not sex, had happened.

And the person she'd supposedly had it with was nowhere to be found.

With a grunt, she rolled to the other side of the bed, grabbing what she could find of her clothes- a pink v-neck t-shirt. Her Victoria Secret bra and mini skirt however, seemed to have vanished into thin air. As Carly forced her frail body to sit up, a sudden burst of nausea erupted into her stomach, causing her to double over in shock. Oh God…oh God…the pain…she needed to get this out of her body. With a cry, she leaped up from the bed, desperately searching for the bathroom, and stumbling inside.

Carly dug her bare knees into the hard, tile floor, clawing the toilet seat cover until it finally lifted up, as the taste of last night's binge drinking fest crawled up her throat. Before she could even get the hair out of her eyes, every last bit of it was retched violently into the water. With a final gag, she leaned against the cold wall, the chill shocking her shoulders, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand in one frail motion. Her throat burned as if it had been set on fire. Once again, she could hardly breathe, her air passageways blocked by the fear and need to throw up again. Why did she do this to herself? Why couldn’t everything just be nice? Before she knew it, the tears that had sprung in her eyes reduced her to sobs.

Why…why…why….

“MY MILKSHAKE BRINGS ALL THE BOYS TO THE YARD, AND THEY’RE LIKE, IT’S BETTER THAN YOURS. YOU’RE DAMN RIGHT, IT’S BETTER THAN YOURS.”

Carly cried harder, clamping her palms onto her ears. The magenta cell phone blared the music with defiance on top of the sink, (although she could not remember putting it there), tormenting her and making her head vibrate. Suddenly, the wave of revulsion began crawling up her throat again, her stomach churning like a bowl of hot soup. She needed to get all of this…poison out of her body. But that music…it had to stop…she had to make it stop…

With a whimper, Carly clamped her perspiring fingers onto the pink phone, the color making the fluids in her stomach swish back and forth. Her hand trembled as she stared at the screen.
"ONE NEW TEXT MESSAGE" it exclaimed, flashing in her eyes and making her squint.

Hey...I can't go shopping tonight. I have plans with Dustin.

Carly closed her eyes. Shopping...shopping...like she would have been able to go shopping in this state. As goosebumps began to form on Carly's skin, she was about to lean over the toilet again...when she had an idea.

She needed to talk to someone. She needed help. What was she supposed to do? Stay here all night? Whose house was this? She needed her prince charming to come rescue her now. That was his job, wasn't it?

With sweaty fingers, Carly clicked Jordan's name on her contacts, closing her eyes again, her head still spinning as it dialed.

"Jordan?" she whispered. "Jordan...I...I don't know where I am and I'm s-sick and can you please pick me up? Please? I need you."

• • • • •

TAG JORDAN CARTER
WORD COUNT 634
STATUS complete
OUTFIT Ummm, a pink v-neck t-shirt and underwear... XD
NOTES awwww, carly. oh well. she deserves it. XD
CREDIT justlikefalling @ caution 2.0
LYRICS bruised & scarred , MAYDAY PARADE

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• • • • •

[JORDAN KELLEY]

I SHOULD HAVE LEFT MY PHONE AT HOME CUZ THIS IS A

*- - - DISASTER!!!

Ho fucking damn. Jordan had hit the jackpot, and it had won him not only some kickin' new god status but the hottest little package known to man. Right now he was just kinda chillin' in her den. She was up doing...girly shit or whatever the fuck it was that girls did after doing the nasty. Whatever, he wasn't complaining. After a night like that she could do whatever the hell she wanted to for however long she wanted as long as she came on back to Jordan for another go eventually.

Jordan settled back onto the sofa thing and was just starting to vaguely wonder if he could get one more time outta Jack for the day when he heard the phone ringing from his pants pocket....across the room.

Jordan wanted to ignore. He should just ignore the damn thing. It wouldn't have mattered....if it had been any other fucking ring tone blasting angrily into the room. Jordan's eyes shot to the stairs to see if Jack had showed any signs of hearing it and decided to head down to check it out. Shit. He had to shut that thing up.

Jesus Christ, leave it to the bitch herself to figure out she had to call when Jordan was trying to get some with another chick. Shit, why the fuck was he even still bothering her? Why WOULD he still bother with her? he was a fucking GOD, man! He didn't have to put up with her brand of skankiness when he could get any chick he wanted to! The deal with her had been goin' sour for a while now but calling in the middle of a booty call? She was fucking going down. Hard. The minute he could fucking find his pants and grab his phone out of the pocket. Jesus christ, how hard were they goin' at it last night? He was pretty sure his pants shouldn't have gotten this far from the bed.

Snatching the pants off the floor he tried to figure out how fucking fast he could make this go to get the point home to the hoe and still have time for a little fucking with Jack.Ripping the phone out of his pocket, he flipped it open and gruffly(but softly enough to keep a turned on Jack as oblivious as possible) barked "What?"

"Jordan? Jordan...I...I don't know where I am and I'm s-sick and can you please pick me up? Please? I need you."

Jordan quickly felt a confused frown tug on his face. What the fuck was he to her, some kinda fuckin' taxi service? Fuck that. He was sick and tired of this kinda shit happening with her. it was time to end whatever the fuck she still thought was going on other than frequent screw sessions.

"Look bitch, I am NOT pickin' your sorry ass up anytime soon, gotit? I'm fuckin' busy screwin' right now, kay? Fuck off and blow someone else for a ride if you know what's good for you."

*- - - words520
*- - - tagsCarly
*- - - notesI'm.....frightened of this....so much.

[CARLY GRANT]

I'M BRUISED AND SCARRED
save me from this broken heart
ALL MY LOVE WILL SLOWLY FADE
& F A L L A P A R T
• • • • •

Carly’s breaths came soft and rigid as she held desperately held the phone to her ear, trying as hard as she could to keep her heart from exploding. He needed to do this. He couldn’t betray her. She’d done everything she possibly could to please him, and maybe once, just once, he would show for sure that he cared about her. That she was more than a quick screw. She simply needed to know that she was loved, and have him put his arms around her, and perhaps, for once, let her keep her clothes on. She sighed, leaning back on the sink, her eyes still heavy.

She needed love. That’s all she wanted.

"Look bitch, I am NOT pickin' your sorry ass up anytime soon, gotit? I'm fuckin' busy screwin' right now, kay? Fuck off and blow someone else for a ride if you know what's good for you."

…What?

Carly gasped, the phone slipping from her fingers, allowing it to land on the ground with a sickening thud. Once again, the tile scratched her knees raw as she scrambled to retrieve it, his words echoing deafeningly in her head, her mind throbbing with a feeling that sliced her from the inside.

Look bitch…busy screwing…fuck off…blow someone else…

A bitch. He had called her a bitch. Jordan…the one she’d given the past year to. Jordan…who she’d crawled out of bed for whenever he had some midnight cravings.

Whenever he needed his bitch.

He’d lied to her. No, perhaps not lied. But…kept secrets. It hurt just as badly. It wasn’t as if Carly hadn’t ever cheated on him, but the thought that he would…she needed to throw up again.

“But…but…what?” she weeped. “Screwing? Who…? Oh Jordan…”

She had no idea what she was even saying anymore. She was furious and sad and exhausted and simply too sick to care about any of those emotions.

“Please ba-baby…” she begged hoarsely. “I don’t know where I am…this house…it…it’s not mine. My car is…gone. Please. I’ll give you a-anything you want…later…please…I’m scared…”

The nausea was coming back again, and she forced herself to keep it from coming up her throat.

“Jordan,” she finally whispered, her eyes now much redder than before. “I love you…don’t…don’t you love me?”

• • • • •

TAG JORDAN CARTER
WORD COUNT 374
STATUS complete
OUTFIT Ummm, a pink v-neck t-shirt and underwear... XD
NOTES This is so sad
CREDIT justlikefalling @ caution 2.0
LYRICS bruised & scarred , MAYDAY PARADE

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• • • • •

[JORDAN KELLEY]

I SHOULD HAVE LEFT MY PHONE AT HOME CUZ THIS IS A

*- - - DISASTER!!!

Jordan tried to keep from physically ccounting the seconds left in the phone call. This was supposed to be going quickly as fucking possible so he could get back to getting it on for Jack. Every minute he spent bitching at Carly was another minute that Jack could come down all ready for a little somethin'. He was in friggin' jeopardy just talking to this bitch.

Jesus Christ. Jordan heard a thud come crackling in from over the line. Did that dumb hoe seriously drop the phone. What the fuck? Oh, christ, and now she was like, fuckin' SOBBING into the fucking phone. He should just hang up right now and save him the shrieks and cries and whatever the fuck she had left in her.

Before he could cancel the call though she started right up.

“Please ba-baby…I don’t know where I am…this house…it…it’s not mine. My car is…gone. Please. I’ll give you a-anything you want…later…please…I’m scared…Jordan, I love you…don’t…don’t you love me?”

Jordan practically snorted into the phone. It was fucking pitiful having to listen to her come up with what she thought would get him to give her another friggin' second of his life. God, what the hell was she thinking? That 'love' was some kind of magic word/ Hell, it was the biggest fucking turn-off for every guy everywhere.

Fucking DUMB bitch.

"Look you retarded dumbshit, I DON'T love you, I NEVER loved you and I WON'T love you. Deal with it. And what the hell, you fucked yourself over with that whole "don't know where i am" bullshit. Hope you have fun figuring that shit out. Now shut the fuck up, because I have better things and people to do."

Before he could hear any more hurt little whimpers ring through the phone he snapped it shut and boredly dropped it into his heap of pants on the floor at his feet. Where the hell was Jack? He needed a little something something to distract him from that whore.

*- - - words358
*- - - tagsCarly
*- - - notesSORRY IT'S SO SHORT :/

[CARLY GRANT]

I'M BRUISED AND SCARRED
save me from this broken heart
ALL MY LOVE WILL SLOWLY FADE
& F A L L A P A R T
• • • • •

"Look you retarded dumbshit, I DON'T love you, I NEVER loved you and I WON'T love you. Deal with it. And what the hell, you fucked yourself over with that whole "don't know where i am" bullshit. Hope you have fun figuring that shit out. Now shut the fuck up, because I have better things and people to do."

As the phone went dead in her hands, Carly’s entire world crumbled into shambles.

DON’T love you…NEVER loved you…WON’T love you…

No one loved her.

She was incapable of love.

How could anyone love a human being like this? How could anyone love such a cold blooded, vile thing? She’d been wrong. She’d been so, so wrong. All the times she had let a man have their way with her, every time she had backstabbed someone just to see them die inside…it had all been a huge mistake. Power was temporary. Love was forever. And she had destroyed both. Suddenly, frightening thoughts began to tumble in her head.

Was this the torture she had forced others to endure? Was this how Scarlett felt when she plunged that knife into her veins? Was this the despair that Hilary felt when her dreams were shattered by venomous words? This didn’t even feel like living. This felt like every repulsive emotion bubbling inside her body at once. Her throat was throbbing from heaves of sobs, and her face was so tearstained, it was hard to look at, but she simply couldn’t stop. This was it. She was done.

“Honey, shhh. Please, sweetie. You’re going to ruin your pretty eyes with all this crying…look, your nails are getting all messed up, you silly girl. Hush….everything is going to be wonderful…”

Carly’s head jolted upwards, colliding painfully with the counter above her, which only made her cry harder. Her eyes blurred as she stared at the golden haze before her, transfixed as it slowly transformed, almost blinding her with this brightness. Great. Now she was going crazy. She was going fucking crazy. Or maybe this was an angel....no, a devil coming to take her.

“I wanna die...!” she wailed, rolling onto her stomach and burying her head in her arms. “Just take me now! Please…I wanna die! I don’t care if I go to Hell, I don’t caaaare…I wanna die…”

“Oh love, don’t say stupid things like that,” the voice proclaimed, although its tone was surprisingly sweet. “You’re not going anywhere. You’re just getting…another friend.”

For some reason that she could not explain, Carly groggily lifted her head, her eyes shocked by the vibrant light radiating in all directions. Before her, stood the most…mesmerizing being she had ever laid eyes on.

Carly felt like a hideous worm crushed under a shoe compared to this woman. She was gorgeous, from the long, golden locks that flowed elegantly to her waist, to the pale skin that seemed to shimmer with each of her movements, even to the somewhat familiar sapphire eyes, smooth and mysterious as a feline’s. She was too entrancing to be…real. There was something dangerous about her, but it was so hypnotizing, Carly could not move her eyes.

“What…who…are…you?”

The woman laughed, a chirpy little giggle, sitting gracefully beside the tearstained Carly, and running her hand gently down her cheek.

“Think of me as your…guide,” she murmured, her voice smooth and comforting as honey. “Your guardian angel, if you will. Some call me the goddess of discord, but you…you can call me Eris.”

Carly cried out, her eyes widening.

“Eris?” she whispered. “Like…the Sinbad movie? Oh my God, I’m going nuts…I’m going crazy…I’m going fucking insane…please kill me…please just let me die…”
Once again, she was reduced to sobs, and she could feel the golden haze approach her.

“Sinbad?” the voice rasped. “Oh no. Not that abomination! I am NOT Eris from Sinbad, my…dear. And you’re not crazy. You are perfectly sane. You are simply special. You are simply better than everyone else.”


Carly’s bottom lip quivered violently as this mysterious being handed her a golden handkerchief.

“Here, honey. Get all of that junk out of your nose. It’s going to clog your pores.”

What was happening? This couldn’t exist.

“Now, dear, is he really worth this crying?” Eris asked her gently. “Do you really love him so? I hope not. For there is no doubt in my mind that you are superior to him.”

Carly sniffled, sloppily blowing her nose into the handkerchief, her eyes widening in awe. Too good for him? But he had left her. He had deserted her. He didn’t love her.

“Superior?” Carly’s voice trembled. “No I’m not. I’m horrible. Everyone thinks I’m just a…wh-wh-whore…”

“Nooooo, cupcake, please don’t say silly things like that,” Eris cooed, placing her cold, French manicured hand on Carly’s shoulder. “Look at you. Look at this beauty. This beautiful hair, these beautiful eyes, this beautiful body. It’s jealousy. Everyone is jealous of you. Who could not be jealous of someone so beautiful, so completely alluring? They call you a whore because they cannot handle your exquisiteness. They cannot handle that they are just normal and you are fascinating.”

The gears in Carly’s head began whirring. Yes…it all made sense. Jealousy. She was beautiful. She was perfection.

“Then…why didn’t he want me?” she ventured. “Why doesn’t he want me if I am beautiful?”

“Because he knows he is nothing in comparison,” Eris whispered soothingly. “He knows you deserve more than he can offer. So he must hurt you in order to save you. But if you are angry with him, if you want him to suffer for this pain, if you want him to die, darling…that can all happen in good time.”

Eris slowly began running her fingers through Carly’s knotted, disheveled curls.

“You mean I could KILL him?” Carly rasped, the thought twisting in her mind like a snake.

“Well perhaps, not right away,” Eris explained. “And I know what you’re thinking, honey. That it would be wrong to kill, that it would be wrong to cause people pain. But, you see, child, there is nothing wrong with it at all. In fact, it is how the world’s order establishes itself. Sometimes, people don’t get what they deserve. Sometimes people are deprived of things they deserve. Like the man they truly love, for instance. Or an invitation to someone’s wedding. You know, the usual things. And when people don’t get what they deserve…they get what they deserve. Because they work for it. And they punish those who deprived them. Do you understand?”

Eris delicately brushed her hands through Carly’s hair once more, letting it smoothly flow down her shoulders, its silky beauty restored. Once again, it was beautiful, with a new golden shine, the evidence of despair cleansed away. Carly stared at it, transfixed, and nodded slowly. Yes….she did understand.

“Now I’d like to applaud you, my dear,” Eris continued, giving Carly a sickly sweet smile, and beginning to swiftly wipe away the darkness under the girl’s eyes. “You have learned to conquer. You have learned to gain power. But I’m afraid you have not learned to use your power correctly. You have underestimated your true potentional.”

The bags under Carly’s eyes had melted away. Eris began working on restoring the healthy glow to her cheeks.

“You have dominated the area of your peers,” she said. “High school is indeed, your kingdom. But I can help you, Carly. I can broaden your kingdom. I can make this world, this universe, each and every piece of land on this earth and beyond…it can all be your kingdom. It can all belong to you. You deserve to be queen…no, empress of this world, and I will be sure you receive what you deserve. There will not be a single human on this earth that does not worship the beautiful, the glorious, the perfect, Royal Highness, Carly Madeline Grant.”

Carly’s eyes lit up, her mind swirling with visions, visions of grandeur. Visions of castles and gowns and gold and riches and slaves. Visions of being the best, of ruling the entire universe. Carly could feel those gowns on her skin, feel the scepter in her hand, feel the power at her very fingertips, feel the fear in her subject’s souls. She wanted it.

“What is it you want right now, Carly?” Eris hissed smoothly, as if reading her mind. “Anything you want, you can have. It’s all about power. I can help you get anything you want.”

“I want…” she whispered, closing her eyes. “I want to rule the world. I want to be with Lane. I want him to be my king, forever and ever and e-…”

“What about before that?” Eris interupted eagerly, excitement lingering on her tone. “What about this man that brought you here? That took advantage of your beauty? That left you hear almost naked, and did not blink twice? What would you like to do to him, Carly? Do you want him to suffer?”

Carly’s eyebrows wrinkled into a furious glare, as recent memories of the morning stirred in her mind. Feeling sick, feeling horrible, being used. It was all HIS fault. She didn’t even know who he was, and yet, she knew…he deserved this.

“Yes…” she said, a bloodthirsty grin twisting onto her face. “He deserves to suffer. He must PAY for what he has done to me. He. must. pay.

“Excellent,” Eris smiled warmly. “I knew you would understand the way the world should be, Carly. I knew you were the one.”

She slowly raised her hands in the air, providing a burst of glittering smoke. From it, came a golden blade, its tip shining in the light, sharper than any knife Carly had ever seen. Almost on cue, the front door of the house slammed, boisterous footsteps beginning to tap along the stairs. Eris’s eyes shined hungrily.

“Here,” she purred, softly placing the blade into Carly’s hands. “Do it.”

“Kill him?” Carly asked feebly, as if speaking to her queen.

“Yes, of course, darling,” Eris assured her. “It is the quickest way to get rid of him, you know.”

His footsteps were approaching…quicker, quicker, quicker. The blind rage pulsed through Carly’s veins like a drug, filling her with bursts of sheer power. Her hand tightened on the blade, and she crawled toward the door, slowly lifting herself to her feet, opening it only a crack, gliding through and standing in the middle of the hallway. She gripped the knife tightly behind her back, her fingers cold and silent.

He was in front of her.

Immediately, her fury and revulsion became stronger. He was disgusting. Greasy hair matted to his forehead like dead snakes, beady little eyes, teeth stained and crooked. That fact that he had touched her…the fact that he had even been near her…it made her want to kill.

“Ohhhh, heeey there, baaaaby doll,” he drolled, a drunken smile on his face. “Didn’t expect to see you STILL here, hot cakes. But that's okay. You were good last night. I had FUN with you, you little…whore.…”

NO.

With a wild scream, the knife flew from behind her back, and dug into his chest…over, and over, and over, she stabbed him, his wails of horror only egging her on. NO ONE would treat her this way again. NO ONE. WOULD EVER. DO THIS. The blood stained her hands a sickly crimson, the same as her eyes.

The man groaned, clutching his chest, tears running down his face, utter agony transforming his features. He was not done yet, however. There was one final thing he needed to hear.

Carly leaned down, looking him dead in the eyes, the blade still shining in her palm.

“I. am not. a whore.”

With that, she let out an echoing laugh, stabbing him one last time, hearing his final grunt.

And then…there was silence.

Breathing heavily, Carly stared below her, the eyes of this man…no this, creature staring back at her like the lifeless eyes of a porcelain doll. She had done it.

Revenge was beautiful.

Suddenly, Eris emerged before her again, a wicked grin planted upon her face, nodding to Carly approvingly, the body dull and heavy on the ground.

“Now,” she whispered, patting Carly’s hair again. “Don’t you feel better?”

She nodded, twisting the knife in her hands, which had mysteriously retained its golden tint, the blood vanished from sight.

“Good,” Eris said happily. “Now I cannot assure you that all people will receive what they deserve so quickly, dear. Sometimes it will take weeks, or months, or even years, but they will get it. If you work hard enough. Now…what do you want now?”

Carly smiled. She liked this. Being able to have what she wanted. And she knew what she wanted right now. First, she stashed the body underneath the bed she’d woken up in today, running her hands under the tap to rid herself of the blood. She slowly walked back into the bathroom, putting the blade on the counter, and letting her phone replace it in her hand. Then…she dialed his number.

“…Lane?” she whispered. “Lane…can you come pick me up? Jordan…he…he won’t come get me, and I’m scared, and I don’t know where I am, do you think you can find me? Please.”

• • • • •

TAG LANE ERICHSON
WORD COUNT 2, 024
STATUS complete
OUTFIT Ummm, a pink v-neck t-shirt and underwear... XD
NOTES WOOOT.
CREDIT justlikefalling @ caution 2.0
LYRICS bruised & scarred , MAYDAY PARADE

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• • • • •